Big Long Post Part 1

Good news! I saw my psychologist this morning and she said I'm cured!

Ok not really, but we went through the symptoms of Bipolar II and she helped me understand what to look for. It's looking like a pretty solid no, so that's good. I couldn't bear to be on lithium and ruin my girlish figure.

She was a little surprised at how much progress I've made, which is a good thing. Besides her, I've had two other people with personal knowledge of anxiety tell me that I'm doing really well for the time I've had since this started. I am now able to calm myself with breathing exercises and aerobic activity when I feel a lot of anxiety coming on. My favorite breathing exercise, which is useful for anyone to do once or more daily is taking a slow deep breath in through your nose while expanding your diaphragm, holding it for four seconds and then slowly blowing out your mouth. After a few times of doing it I can go from anxious to sleepy. TRY IT NOW!!!!!

I don't fear (let alone have) panic attacks when going out to restaurants or stores anymore, and I haven't had a full attack for two weeks or more. (I'll have to check my blog to see when the last one was)

I also haven't taken a Xanax in two weeks that I know of, except at my Grandma's memorial. On the way down (it was a 1 hour drive), I was doing breathing exercises and trying to get things under control, but realized it was kind of a stupid day to be fighting that stuff. The next morning I played at church and led one song and didn't need Xanax. (yay!) The day after that we went down to Tahoma National Cemetery for the burial service and I did fine then as well.

The psychologist (along with everyone else I talk to) is encouraging me to take the full sabbatical that was offered until January, but not to stay out of everything. Originally she was concerned that I was off work for so long, but now that she sees I'm involved in a lot of activities and getting out, she thinks it's fine. My counselor put it a different way: "If you don't take this break you're being given, your body will give you another break that you won't like." (Such as a heart attack or a nervous breakdown)